So you want to come to Glasgow?

[This is a sample of an in-character introduction you might get on contacting the straight-talking (some might say overly-aggressive… but not to her face) Scourge of Glasgow, Heather “Jack” Jackman. It is intended to give a rough flavour of what a new character might experience on their first night. The Scourge might not be happy to see visitors but there will always be other city residents open to conversation, making deals (and enemies) and exchanging favours. For more information, players can contact the Storytelling team]

So you want to come to Glasgow?

Why? Why the f*%k would you want to come to Glasgow?  You’ll get asked in a much nicer way at the court… probably something like “Oh, what brings you here?” but it amounts to the same thing. Who are you, what do you want, and what can you do for me?

Don’t get me wrong. Glasgow is a city of opportunity. We get as many potential Archons and Justicars out this place as we do dregs and dropouts. Some people describe it as a crucible; If you can survive the Sabbat and the Hunters and whatever other weird sh*t that hides in the dark corners then you’ll come out a stronger person. Bruised, battered… and I don’t just mean physically… maybe even a bit broken… but stronger.

What’s your clan? Yes, I know that’s a rude question but I’m the f$%king Scourge so I get to ask.  Most Scourges just want to know if you are Caitiff but I don’t care about any thin-blood shit; I wanna know if you are one of those Independent clans who come here to lurk or skulk in the cracks of the city. Or maybe you’re a refugee from the Sabbat and then I’m really f$%king keeping an eye on you. Anarchs wander through here a lot… which is fine, by the way, but don’t expect me to be happy about it.

But really, if you aren’t full-blooded Camarilla then you’ll get shoved into the sidelines – ground troops for the next time the Sabbat try to f*&k with us. I mean, it’s a Camarilla city for f*&ks sake, right? Prove yourself effective, competent, and before long you’ll find yourself getting calls from the domain officers to get involved with sh*t. Get your clan mobilised and end up Primogen. Build some influence and a reputation and it’s a small step to Keeper of the Masquerade or some other domain office. Be the biggest gossip and be Harpy. And if you can do all that then the next time the opportunity arises being Prince is a real possibility.

I’m getting ahead of myself. The very first step is getting you into the city to see the Prince. It’s good you called me first. You could maybe have contacted the Senechal or the Prince directly, but if you contact me first then I don’t f*$king stake you when I see an unfamiliar face wandering about the domain. But if you want to make a good impression, then bring us a Letter of Introduction.  Think of it like your references for a CV and a background check rolled into one. It’s your first impression for the Prince… i.e. the person that decides if you can stay or not. It can be a hand-scrawled note from your best pal or a fancy-scribed missive full of superlatives from your last Prince but, either way, it’ll smooth your way into the city.  Of course, the better the letter the more of a head-start you get. Just don’t f*&k it up. Cos I’m the one who has to eject you from the city with a failed application.

Other cities do it a bit different, but this is what you should expect for your first court. We don’t publicise the actual court location in advance. What we do instead is publish a random location to use as a staging point.  I’ll be there (or one of my ghouls) and you walk up (or send one of your ghouls) and I give you the real location. I know it’s inconvenient, but it stops random mortals or even supernaturals wandering in without us knowing about it. And yes, that has f*$king happened. And yes, it also means that you have to dress and act like you are keeping the Masquerade… cos you f*&king are.

Right, then you’ve made it into the court. If you’ve contacted us properly in advance, then we can point you at some clanmates. You can roam freely about the court until the Prince finishes his meetings with city officers and Primogen. Then you get a nice, welcoming interview where the Prince will ask those questions I mentioned. Who are you? Why are you here? What can you do? What can you contribute to our wonderful city? Are you a complete f^%kwit who is unable to uphold the traditions and is more trouble than they are worth?

Assuming you haven’t just announced that you are a member of the Sabbat and want to kill us all, then the Prince will give you a trial period to reside in the city. You just have to get through that without breaking any of the traditions or doing anything completely stupid and you’ll get full permission to stay in Glasgow.

Good luck. You are going to need it.

Scourge of Glasgow